Neil Strauss

Rules of the Game

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  • b3059588695has quoted6 years ago
    turned to tens of thousands turned to hundreds of thousands. And most of these guys were not assholes and creeps, but nice guys—the ones women always say they’re looking for yet at the same time never seem attracted to.

    So I decided to bite the bullet. You’re now holding that bullet in your hands.

    The Stylelife Challenge is a simple, easy-to-follow guide to approaching and attracting women of quality. Though it is designed for the hardest cases, it has also
  • gscribehas quoted7 years ago
    The things people do and say are not always about you.
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    question or story, and wants to continue making out, just say:
    YOU: Oh, fuck it. Come here.
    You can do this two or three times before proceeding to the next stages, if necessary.
    STAGE THREE: PACE HER REALITY
    If you don’t manage to raise the objection before she does, simply agree when she says that things are going too quickly. Remember, when you’re in the heat of the moment, a logical argument will only make things worse. What she’s responding to is a feeling. So slow down a little but keep the passion high, so that you’re both agreeing that you’re being “bad” while continuing to make out and turn each other on.
    HER: We should stop.
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    it’s called private life for a reason. It should be private.
    STAGE TWO: BE THE FIRST TO STOP
    You never want a woman to tell you to stop or slow down. To keep this from happening, suggest the idea before she does. So if you start to sense resistance or anxiety from her, stop kissing or remove your hands from whatever they’re touching, and say something like the following:
    YOU: Whoa, we should stop. This is going way too fast.
    HER: Yeah.
    YOU: Let’s talk a little. Like, uh, have you ever ridden a horse before?
    If she tells you a story, listen to it and talk a little, then start making out again. If she seems bored by the
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    girls for giving it up too quickly. They’re glad to get that whole awkwardness over with so something more can develop.
    HER: Maybe. I don’t know.
    ME: Really. I had this friend who was a bit of a player. And one night, he went out, met a woman, and had sex with her in the bathroom within fifteen minutes. And now they’re married. If there’s chemistry, there’s chemistry. The other thing that’s important, though, is you want to make sure you’re with a guy who’s discreet, who doesn’t kiss and tell. You’re not one of those people who goes and tells your friends everything afterward, or, like, Twitters all about it, are you?
    HER: No.
    YOU: That’s a relief. I feel like
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    wait as long as it takes to sleep with a girl. They’ll hang in there for months just to “get some.” What most women don’t understand is that before the first date is over, the guy already knows if she’s girlfriend material.
    So the real truth is, you should never sleep with a guy until he knows your value. In other words, until you know he appreciates you for something more than sex—for who you are—don’t sleep with him. But sometimes you can meet someone right away and just connect, and it’s right. Whether you sleep with him that night or a week later, he’s still going to feel the same about you. In my experience, the most passionate relationships usually begin passionately. Most normal guys don’t actually judge
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    YOU: A lot of women worry about how long to wait to sleep with someone. And whenever they ask me how many dates they should wait to have sex with someone they like, I just think, ‘You don’t understand men at all.”
    HER: What do you mean?
    YOU: I mean, some guys will
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    YOU: Stop looking at me like that. You’re distracting me.
    HER: Like what?
    Take the top of her head, and
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    that, let’s have our first date right now. We’ll go on, say, a seven-minute date. [Check watch.] It’s 9:50 right now. How about meeting at 9:52 at, say, that table right over there.
    HER: Okay. See you there. Don’t be late, now.
    Meet her there. Time the date. Perhaps do one of the value demonstration routines from this book on the date.
    YOU: Wow, it’s 9:59 already. Time really flies with you. Thank you for a lovely evening. And don’t get any ideas, because I don’t kiss on the first date.
    Shake her hand formally. Afterward, you may either end the date:
    YOU: Listen, I think this is going too fast. It’s not you. It’s me. I’m just not ready for a serious relationship right now. I hope you’ll understand and not take it too hard.
    Or go on a second date, after which you can now kiss her good night.
    YOU: Hey, listen, I had a really great time with you tonight. We should do this again sometime. Are you free in, say, two minutes
  • alplassic1has quoted7 years ago
    YOU: You seem cool, and I can totally imagine wanting to hang out with you again. If I was one of those guys over there, I’d probably ask you out on a date. But dates are so awkward. Who wants to spend four hours sitting across the table from a stranger who you may end up not even liking?
    HER: I know. I could tell you stories.
    YOU: Hey, so instead of doing
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